Thursday, June 6, 2013

While I was away...

I'm back, and a bit more grounded. I saw that therapist on Tuesday. I did like him and agreed to go back. I'm a bit more an edge but it's a controlled panic, if that makes sense. My mind has really calmed and quieted down. It's not racing with chaotic thoughts. Sir assures me this is good, even if it's a bit eerie.

Some confrontations and honest conversations later find Sir and I doing quite well. It's having a line and keeping to it. I guess I sometimes push and He pushes back. Then we both end up unhappy. Y'all get the fallout. It's not good for anyone.

Thankfully, we talk all the time. Even when we're not doing as well, we still text all the time. Trying to make things better. I think some space away from here did help me sort myself out enough to be able to express some important pieces to Him. Which in turn let Him see exactly where I was coming from and where I stand with things. It turns out we're still on the same page. At times it feels like one of us is reading ahead (yeah, that's likely me, lol) or that we're reading entirely different books. We did manage to figure it all out though. That's all I really wanted.

We are likely going to a renn faire this Sunday. Funnily enough, it's about 10 minutes from where I was born and spent the first 7 years of my life. I haven't been to that area in years. It's been a decade since I went to visit family there. Though I'm pretty certain I went down on Palm Sunday in 2007 to visit my mother's grave.

It's strange, ya know? I've only lived two places in that state. When we were out that way in the early spring, we were not 10 minutes from where I grew up. We even passed my high school. Now there are plans to go back, in a completely different part of the state, yet it's one that will always have place of importance. An unusual coincidence. An oddness that I felt needed to be pointed out.

I was able to convince Sir to let me spoil Him at the end of the month, as a birthday present. I can't reveal the details, as much of it will be a surprise but He's in for a treat. I told Him I want at least 24 hours of His time. That we'll be worn out by the end is an understatement. :)

While I was gone, Sarah made sure I wasn't alone. During one of our conversations, she mentioned that who everyone is in my life is a touch confusing. So look for a better explanation of people in my next post. It's the least I can do, as I'm sure she's not the only one confused by who is who.

But I am back. Hopefully with more peace and an inner calm.


  1. Welcome Back JAS .. we missed you.

    As I already stated I am glad that you have found a therapist you like and hopefully things will go productively for you. :D

    It sounds like the break was exactly what you (and Sir) needed, though!


    1. Daww, thanks. :)

      We can hope! I see Him next Tuesday. I already have new things (well, reactions) to discuss. Yay?? LOL I asked Sir at one point why I agreed to go. "Because you want to get better and you know this will help." Damn you, Sir, with your rational explanations! He does that to me ALL the time.

      Yes, a break away from everything was good for us. It gave us time to focus on each other and not so much trying to communicate through here. While not a terrible idea, we do interact better in an ongoing exchange.

      *hugs* thanks, always :)

  2. Glad your back. *cartwheels*
    I've said this before but I'm so glad you and Sir communicate so well! At least that's one obstacle you don't have to cross. :)

    So glad you're doing better. You're going to have so much fun Sunday! Excited for you!!!!

    1. I know!! Thank God we communicate...I don't know about well...but we do it so often that eventually we figure things out. Hahaha!

      I hope Sunday will be able to happen. The weather is kind of iffy for this weekend with a storm passing through now and another one coming in after it. There's a 20% chance for thunderstorms. So I'll be keeping an eye on that.

      Sir arrived back safe and sound around noon. Hooray!!! So glad He's back home!!