As for Him and I, we're fine. We've talked about it and I think worked our way through it. I'm still a little off, and it's showing in other areas of my life. It'll just take some time to recover.
Our connection/relationship is solid. The trust and communication skills we've established allowed for Him to guide me away from an emotional crash. Those have allowed us to continue talking and building up what exists...instead of tearing it down.
It opened up a pathway of communication we've been keeping silent on. One I think once out in the open, it'll really put us on the same page. Simply, we're still not saying some things about ourselves, and each other. We can't work with a true understanding of the situation without full disclosure.
And He agreed with me on that. He made a comment that He may be more aware of things than He lets on. I told Him that's not really healthy either. Information and discussions don't have to lead to actions. They do lead to more open communication and peace of mind.
As for that word "obsession"...His explanation of the use of the word:
"to me, the term has no innate negative context;
an obsession is simply that which dominates a persons thoughts
and which they devote themselves to"
I've been sitting here with that word. Beyond all the points of past harm and why the word would upset me. Beyond my notions of its negative implications. I can put those aside and yet there's still an ache within me.
So I took a step back and wondered why. Because I don't want Him to see me in a negative light. I don't want my actions to make Him uncomfortable. I don't want to further complicate or bother what is between us.
His answer to that has been there all along:
"I just don't want you thinking that I think that you're doing something wrong"
That about sums it all up, doesn't it? :)
I have a feeling we'll be stronger for this in the long run.