Asking For Help

I came home Saturday evening. Exhausted, worn out, glad to be back. Things didn't quite go as planned on the last day.

I was giving the monster a bath on Friday afternoon. When I carried him into the master bedroom to dry him off, my right ankle gave out on me. I could barely put my weight on it, let alone be able to carry the monster down and up the stairs.

I sent Sir a text, freaking out. I didn't know what I was going to do. He offered His assistance, but made me expressly ask for help. I did notice that, heh. He was a god send. Excellent with the monster and was exactly what I needed.

Not only did He help with the monster, He took excellent care of me. I asked that He stay the night. If something happened in the night, I didn't want to be alone and injured. I also didn't know how I'd be the next morning. It was a good call on my part. Especially since I had bashed the back of my head against cabinets a few hours earlier. Apparently I didn't make that clear until the next morning. I did say that I only bumped my head so the error was on my end. Sir was "incredulous" that I don't take better care of myself. It was no wonder I was overheating and feverish.

I received a lecture for that. Sir made it known that I overdo and wear myself out. That it wasn't acceptable.  I couldn't help anyone if I always gave too much of myself. Before He left Saturday morning, He asked for all that needed to be done. He did everything necessary, telling me I wasn't to do anything else. My job was to take care of myself and rest. I tried to verbally resist. He countered by making the line very clear.

It had two interesting effects. My "little" made an appearance. I typically keep that far from Him, but head injuries have this habit of lowering my walls and defenses. He handled it well though. And I did explain what happened so He wouldn't think I had lost my mind, heh. It was only one aspect of my personality that came through in our time together. Sometimes I should learn to keep my mouth shut. Avoiding head injuries would help that. The other effect was that I did take care of myself. I have been ever since. I knew He was right. Plus, He gave me an explicit line not to cross so I haven't done so.

Friday night and Saturday morning were not all business though. Once the monster was in bed, Sir and I enjoyed time together. He ordered in for us, yummy Chinese food. Then we watched a silly, fun movie called "Galaxy Quest." We crashed for the evening after that. Both of us were exhausted, more than ready to sleep.

The next morning, after taking care of the pups and the monster, we crawled back into bed until a little after 10 am, sleeping on and off. Yes, we did have some fun for ourselves. But mainly we cuddled and talked. About chakras, energy play, energy blockages that block natural flow. I talked and cried. He did His best to help heal some old wounds.

We talked about us. Things unsaid, the uncertain future, how even if romance wasn't in our future that he'd always be in my life. I said I didn't think I could handle that. He disagreed saying that if it happened, we'd both be prepared for it. This prompted a story. It'll be up tomorrow for you to read. Because He only became part of my life fairly recently, there's a lot He doesn't know. There's a lot that I'm just now realizing and figuring out. I'll have a post ready for after the story to provide explanation and insight.

We spoke of other, private topics. Of conversations that need to happen, but not yet. I think parts were lost in translation. Maybe the story and following explanation will help clarify matters.

Since Wednesday though, we've been doing really good. We've resumed connecting. I felt comfortable to turn to Him again. I did so without hesitation on Friday. If I've learned anything, and if this is meant to work out in the end, we're the kind of people who will find a way.