Monday, January 21, 2013

In Trying to Understand, We Get a Little Lost

It was lovely to be out yesterday! Hugs and snuggles abounded!

Everyone was happy to see their kitten doing better. Though I managed to somewhat hide the damn cough that wanted to make a reemergence and leave me struggling to breathe.

I was able to see Him which was so lovely! Though He does owe me more cuddles, lol. I'll be sure to cash those in when I see Him next.

All of my recent writings had left Him uneasy. Misunderstandings. You'd think I'd remember that seems to be the nature of things between us. We sorted it out a bit, without really getting into the specifics.

He thought I wanted Him to be "Uber Dom" 24/7, 365. *shakes head* That was not my intention and I think He sees that now.

We have much more to discuss. I really don't want to write about it here until He and I talk. Or it may end up causing further confusion.

So this week will be spent on other ideas. I've been reading enough blogs lately that my head is filled with them. I'm also spending a few days with my one friend and her son. I haven't seen them since before Christmas. I can tell y'all about my vanilla-ish life. LOL

I really don't have much of a "vanilla" life. It's more that I do vanilla things with kinky people. Like being dragged to a hockey game with several of my kinky friends. I've never been and apparently it's time. Or some other nonsense. But I enjoy spending time with my friends so I can live with it.

I also volunteered myself to two friends. The ones who always host parties. They're both Dominants and so need a victim volunteer. I'll have to run it by Him, of course. I doubt it'll be any time soon but it's an offer from one friend to another. And I'm not some crazy bitch who's going to fuck up their lives. I have my own business and affairs. This is just for the sake of fun. :)

Back to Him, to end this post...I can see why He'd be a bit concerned. His life is more geared toward vanilla people, and vanilla life in general. Whereas mine is the exact opposite. But I'm not submissive 24/7. Yeah, it's always there if I need it. I'd get burnt out like anyone else if every single second was kink.

The most kink I've had was Sir playing with previously set up orgasm triggers at the event yesterday. Just for fun and because He could. (I'll tell y'all about that in another post, maybe tomorrow.)

Before that? New years eve. Playing with Him. We've not been kinky or bdsm-like in our D/s since then. Sure, the control and power exchange are a constant undercurrent. But it's rarely touched upon. Just in a few bits of conversation now and then.

We're two people. Bonding. Working to understand each other. Sharing bits of our lives. Like I said in my last post, I see a man who constantly intrigues the hell out of me. He is Dominant, but He's far more complex than that alone. And I wouldn't want it any other way.

I may like the Dom...but I'm head over heels in love the man.

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